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Cake day: Jun 24, 2023

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Isn’t the cleric supposed to have the best wisdom score in the party?



How about we discuss those heros in the foreground? Conan-core “armor is for wimps” beefcake/cheesecake aesthetic featuring brown hiphugger jeans, and all illustrated by someone who has no clue how to world a real weapon. Also wtf is the woman even posing with (because I am not going to suggest she’s"wielding "it)? Maybe it’s a staff and her ridiculous pose can be attributed to somatic casting, at which point maybe the one in the middle is a bard doing a stripper sword dance with that terrible stance. Left dude still needs to choke up with his right hand if he wants any kind of power on his swing.


Love this comic, as always. Though I do wonder where Angela’s shield went between panels 4 and 8.


The example in the op says nothing about whether it was ever possible to diffuse the bombs in the first place, so it’s unclear if there is any element of agency at all, let alone how difficult the scenario is to win if that’s even feasible.


If the DM is asking for a blueprint of your home to battle map scale during character creation, you really should have seen this coming.



I have a mixed collection of plastic, metal, and fancy metal dice plus a one pound metal Zocchihedron. I make no excuses. As long as you’re willing and able to carry them around to a game you cannot have too many dice, especially they’re cool ones.


If your dice are damaging your table then your table just isn’t awesome enough. This is not a shortcoming of the dice.


The metal ones are the best. They’re extra shiny, they make more satisfying sounds when rolled, and in emergencies are more effective as weapons (both as caltrops and projectiles).


“I know not from whence thou came, but thou art no child of mine.”

YEET


It’s literally scripted from a D&D game the creator plays.


You want mental damage? I just got my first dose of rural Florida about an hour ago. I didn’t get out of the car but it kinda felt like I was driving through a haunted forest on an alien world.


Ahdok was posting them daily from their archives but that schedule has now completely gone through said archives. Now they’re posting at the rate they make new ones, which IIRC means a bunch of work drawing everything by hand and means less frequent than daily. So this post is the latest and most up to date thing involving Konsi and company.


Sounds kind of mild compared to things my roommate has heard me shouting in one bad accent or another.


Yes, I am. When my turn comes up in combat I’m done in thirty seconds because I pay attention and know how to play my character.


If it takes a half hour for a single round of combat then I will assert that you actually are doing D&D wrong. Players should know the rules for anything their character can do and be paying attention so they’re ready when their turn comes up. Combat and magic rules take up maybe a dozen pages in the PHB, spend an hour and read over them a few times to make those weekly games you invest two to six hours into go much smoother.

The DM should know all the rules. Like most homebrew I see, this is an overly complex “solution” that functions nothing like anything else in the game and wouldn’t be necessary if everyone involved actually learned the real rules. 5e already has an exhaustion mechanic and it works nothing like what is described. Making up new and convoluted rules to be used by people that take six minutes to move and make an attack or cast a spell is not going to accomplish anything but making your combat turns forty minutes long instead of thirty. I play in a game that includes seven PCs including two “lightly experienced” players and one complete noob. Combat rounds take maybe ten minutes, tops, because people pay attention and the DM actually learned all the real rules.


What makes this actually bad is when the players doing it are nonproficient with low wisdom scores.


It’s also the penultimate step towards producing chipped ham which, interestingly enough, is well documented to be the preferred sandwich meat of angels. It’s the final step of altering the texture that releases the abomination and returns the food to God’s light. Some tangy barbecue sauce also helps.


This is the kind of idea that makes a great joke character for a one shot but if you do it for a long term campaign I am pretty sure the DM is legally permitted to beat you with a nine pound salami.


If I were a player in this game I actually would be worried. The DM doesn’t seem to have a clue how to make a balanced encounter and after this is likely to just look up random Monster Manual entries of a CR six levels higher than the party or throw so many weak ones at the party that the action economy makes it impossible to survive.


While I am completely unfamiliar with the system, this information make me want to actively avoid it. Options and details are great up to a point, but past that point it’s just adding more stuff for the sake of having more stuff. And if your selling point is “look at this unironically ridiculous and pointless amount of stuff” then I question your priorities and quality standards.


On one hand, our own history of interactions between foreign and technologically disparate societies would support this kid’s reasoning. On the other hand, said history could possibly explain why no advanced alien race wants to introduce themselves to the violent savages on this planet.

And if you think about it, those two possibilities are not necessarily mutually exclusive.


So somebody took a Nick Cage bit about an AK-47 and changed out some words for a “mech” named after a WWII tank. Not only does it sound like garbled nonsense from someone who lacks a single creative bone in their body but it makes me pity anybody subjected to such a half-assed slapdash of a setting.


I know DMs who think everything is better if it’s homebrew and their games all suck.


I also endorse Pointy Hat and his content. It’s on YouTube, and he’s also recently been streaming multihour world building sessions on Twitch (I think on Saturdays). Lots of good stuff, presented in an entertaining way.


Any result over 10 is better than “average” and means a typical person would more likely not notice someone with a 14. Such a result would be more like just a bit of armored elbow poking out from behind the tree. As the image shows, you may as well be saying that Formula One cars are slow because fighter jets exist.


Flame strike is a legitimate method of fixing some things, and a good cleric knows this.



I think that “look” is just a result of the artist’s drawing style. Everyone looks at least mildly adorable.


What system did you use? First thing coming to my mind would be D20 modern since it’s basically an officially published hack of 3e D&D, so the rules wouldn’t be too foreign to anybody familiar with 5e, and it has actual rules specifically for car chases.


This is one of those classic movies that should be used as a reference when someone asks you to explain what D&D is. Heroes on a quest, or multiple overlapping ones in the case of Westley and Indigo, and the adventures they have along the way.

Another great example with a solid party dynamic among the main cast is Star Wars.


Yeah…I don’t think the person who made this knows how rogues work.



My first thought was a chef’s apron and nothing else, but that might be considered a bit forward on a first date.


One of my most memorable D&D experiences was putting Felicia Day in a gelatinous cube back when I was a DM for True Dungeon.


My first thought is to wonder about how she said an arm was ripped off by an ogre and not a sleeve.


PF2e actually exists because of D&D 5e. 5e is a streamlined and (most people believe) improved version of 3.5, which is exactly what PF1e is under a different label. But to appeal to their rebellious hipster demographic the new PF had to be different and innovative. So you get a bunch of overly complex rules for options and the sake of just being like D&D but still totally not D&D. The result is a decent game that definitely isn’t 5e because it intentionally trades off most of the streamlining that makes 5e more approachable for the sake of complexity and options.

Basically it’s a bunch of pretentious hipster BS.


Bring on the hunters. GeeBee has unhealthy emotional attachment issues, a roll target of 5, and a bandolier of man portable nuclear warheads. In situations requiring stealth or close combat the Davy Crockett weighs a hundred pounds unloaded and would make a very effective bludgeoning device (as an anime girl she is of course strong enough to wield it as such). Or she could always just decide “f- it” and go out in a blaze of glory because nukes. Basically she embodies as personality traits all the ideologies of a circa 1960 Cold War superpower that would motivate them to invent a man portable nuclear weapon with a blast radius greater than it’s maximum range.

Also I think my hair would get me the connections to requisition a Blackhawk.


Much as I suspected. I’ll be taking that one. The eagle will be named Cullum, which was Alvin York’s middle name, for an obligatory obscure reference.